No Respite Needed

Life has slowed down immensely in our household. Dean is requiring more of my presence, which has meant more time at home for both of us.

I've often wondered about other caregivers who seem to be glued to their loved ones and can't seem to relinquish them to the care of others so they can have some respite, needed time for themselves to rejuvenate away from home. But now I am coming to see how this protectiveness could easily happen, especially where dementia is involved.

It feels similar to when a child has recurrent nightmares. As a parent, you feel most qualified to calm the child's fears and make them feel safe again. As Dean's caregiver, I feel the same kind of urgency to be that person he looks to, as he faces some of the altered thoughts and vivid dreams he has experienced lately.

I'm sure my heavenly Father is just as protective of me. He is always standing by, ready to calm my fears, help me feel oriented, stable, and secure. Thank you, Jesus, for always being on the watch. For loving me and keeping me safe. No respite needed for God, our faithful and devoted Caregiver.

Minnie, our faithful and devoted dog, helps keep watch

The Dentist

Last week I accompanied my daughter to the dentist's office for a checkup for my two granddaughters. It was a very kid-friendly dentist, so both girls, just 2 and 4, were allowed to sit in small dentist chairs in the same room, just a few feet from each other, with a TV screen to occupy their minds. I'm sure this was to help reduce the anxiety and fear that small children feel at the dentist.

When it was found that Jenna, the oldest, would require some follow-up work, I overheard the dentist telling her momma not to overburden her with the details of the procedures, even though he explained to my daughter just what would transpire on their next visit. The dentist himself would fill her in on just what was going to happen when they arrived for their next appointment. Once again the fear and anxiety factor was taken into account, even in how information was given to these pint-sized patients.

Our heavenly Father is just as mindful of our potential fears about what will happen at the end of time. As these troublesome events approach, He admonishes us to press together, just as sheep in a flock will do when a predator is near. And He is careful to give us just enough information through the prophets as we need to make it through the hard times. We, as children ourselves, would be much too fearful if we knew all the details too soon. But He will tell us just what we need to know, when we need to know it. I'm glad we live in a people-friendly world. God, like a kid-friendly dentist, will do all He can for His children.

Help in the Fire

3 fire fighters, reaching out to "library kids"

This morning I attended the story time at a public library with my granddaughters. The special feature this week was a visit by three fire fighters, who's fire station is right across the street from the library.

They read a couple of books for the mostly 2-4 year-old crowd. But then one of the men put on his uniform with the special mask, tank, boots, gloves, etc. He was quite unrecognizable, even as a human being, when he got all decked out for fire duty.

I was surprised that several of the children were quite scared of him and retreated to the arms of their mothers. I thought at first that it was not very wise to make these toddlers feel so insecure, but then the men explained that if they had a fire at their house, they didn't have to be afraid of someone who looked like this. There was no need to run away from him. Instead he was there to help them. He kept saying through the mask, "See, I'm still Fireman Bob." After "high-fiving" several of the kids and letting them touch the uniform and get close if they wanted, he took the uniform off so they could see he was still who he was before.

There are many things in life that frighten all of us. How many times do we run away from what we perceive is danger or hard trials, but it turns out to be our salvation? That's why it's so important to get to know God, just like the children needed to know it was really Fireman Bob under all that garb. Because God is a real, caring Being too...and we shouldn't run away from Him, even when there's not a fire.

Becoming More Chewsy

Twice today I almost choked on some food. They weren't bad episodes, but definitely a call for me to slow down my eating, think while I'm eating, and chew, chew, chew. With my lung power so weak, that is one of my greatest fears. I can't cough up things from my "windpipe" like most people can. So, I can really have a dangerous choking episode on almost anything, including things just floating in the air.

I've lost track how many times people have had to call 911 for me. I've never actually passed out, but the last time my daughter said my lips were blue. It usually happens when I'm in the throes of a chest cold. Hence my dread of getting a cold.

My caution with eating is similar to how I must view life. Just take it one bite at a time. Don't bite off more than I can chew, so they say. And the best part is that's how God delivers our future. One day at a time, and sometimes moment by moment. I can also testify that He's faster than any paramedic. He's even faster than the person calling 911.

I've just talked myself out of my greatest fear. And here's a verse for it: "For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind." II Timothy 1:7

P.S. I still think I'll chew better tomorrow.

The King of Peace

Martin Luther King Day to most folks these days means no mail delivery, and the banks, schools, and libraries aren't open. It has meant a relatively peaceful, uneventful day for me. Thank you for that, Mr. King. Peace was your middle name, wasn't it?

I have vague memories of Martin Luther King, Jr. coming to my hometown of St. Augustine, Florida in the sixties. My dad was serving as a deputy sheriff at the time, and I remember there being some dangerous duty he was being called for, but details beyond that were not shared on the homefront. We lived ten miles out of town, so were pretty much out of the news loop. Years later, we learned that Dad was asked by the sheriff to guard Martin Luther King while he was in town. Dad seemed to think he was asked because he was the only "yankee" on the force at the time, so was the only one the sheriff trusted to do it.

Obviously, Mr. King did not have a sterling reputation among the whites of St. Augustine in those days. We were a very, very segregated town. As a matter of fact, I recall seeing very few blacks, downtown or elsewhere. I was astounded to learn of the high percentage of blacks who were living there at the time. I mostly heard that they had their own beach, that they were allowed to sit in the balcony of the only movie theater in town, and that there were black neighborhoods "somewhere," but I was not privy where. You just better not get stranded in one inadvertantly.

It wasn't until I was in high school that the schools began the integration process. And it started with just a handful of black students in the beginning. Tensions were high. I remember one time in the cafeteria there was almost a riot when some food got slung at somebody. Not exactly peaceful times. It took me years, as an adult away from the South, not to feel nervous if a black man stepped into an elevator with me. It just did not feel safe.

Today, the situation has improved, but we are still a country greatly divided. Jesus Himself said, "Suppose ye that I am come to give peace on earth? I tell you, Nay; but rather division:" Luke 12:51 We can have inner peace with Christ in our hearts, but only in the New Earth will we be able to live a truly peaceful life without division. Come, Lord Jesus, come!

http://www.crmvet.org/info/staug.htm    Here's some more information about the events in St. Augustine, if you're interested.