Driving Me Crazy

My days are a blur of late. But one bright beam has entered. I won't have to do as much driving every day, as other arrangements have been made for transporting my granddaughter here for me to babysit.

I love my husband (the one with dementia) and I love my granddaughter (the "real" child), but it's very hard to tell them apart when they're both in a car. I can stand one repetitive singer (the one in the carseat), but their duets are something else.

I try not to discourage their performances though, because at least it distracts my backseat driver, who sits in the front seat, from his constant and often dangerous driving instructions. (If I went every time he said the way was clear, for instance, I would have died a thousand deaths by now.)

Isn't that typical of our lives though? The hardest part about getting to heaven is all the driving it takes. This is what wears us out so much. I'm so glad that our God has offered to do the driving for us. But when I have to be at the wheel, I'm glad He's teaching me not to listen to bad driving advice from others. There's a time to listen and a time to tune out. God will show us the times.

Trapped

I've always wondered why I dread going places in the car with Dean. Nine times out of ten when I've lost patience with him, it's been while we are going someplace in a car. He may have been an excellent truck driver before his injury, but that also seems to qualify him as the worst "back seat driver" now.

Today was no exception, as I really came unglued just as we entered the parking lot of the eye doctor's office. This was our fourth time there in the past week, by the way. It's a long story, but needless to say, I wasn't calmed down enough to do anything but sit in the car while he went in and got the new lens for his glasses.

I got to thinking about why car trips were so difficult for us--especially for me. The thought came to me that in a car, we can't get away from each other. You can't go to another room, or take a walk around the block to cool off. You are stuck in the car with someone you can't deal with and don't want to deal with--and it isn't fun.

Satan loves us to feel trapped like this. He tries to arrange our lives so that we have no way out, so we have no where else to go but to be with him, to follow him, to be miserable with him. He wants to "take us for a ride".

God, on the other hand, bids us enter His house, where there is plenty of room to deal with our sin problems, whatever they are. We need this freedom to grow our patience, heal our anger, and understand our trials.

Next time Dean and I find ourselves in the car, I refuse to feel trapped. I'll just keep focused on the freedom that awaits us at home.

A Caregiving Team

Today I discovered that my chore provider, helping me with Dean, is also going to be helping me! Of course, my biggest chore is taking Dean places, which I have come to really detest and avoid, when possible. An ex-truck driver, who feels his wife, at least, still needs driving instruction after almost 40 years, is not my idea of an ideal passenger. Neither of us are at our best by the time we arrive at our destination. So getting some more assistance with getting Dean out or just away from his recliner will be nice.

She will also be providing us with some needed housekeeping chores. Some of those deep cleaning tasks that I'm not so good at since my pulmonary failure six years ago. Dusting and getting cobwebs, cleaning the tub and floors, and just anything that requires a lot of bending over will be welcome help too.

I've thought of myself as Dean's sole caregiver up until about a year ago, but that just isn't true any more. With nurses and bath aides and now chore providers coming in and out of our lives, I'm now just part of the team. But it's nice to know that my caregiving teammates are looking out for me too.

I think this is also how God wants our church teams to function. We work as a team to keep each other spiritually uplifted and growing in the Lord. All of us need caregiving from each other and need to become involved in each others' lives as much as possible.

I'm glad there are so many people in my life who care enough to get involved. It keeps me going. And that keeps Dean going.

What a Chore!

Today Dean and I were introduced to a new chore provider, the kind who provides you with a completed chore. The chore for which I requested assistance was taking Dean to his pool therapy twice a week. That doesn't sound like a particularly difficult assignment, unless you have ever had Dean as a passenger while you were driving.

Most of the patience I have developed with Dean, an ex-truck driver who hasn't been able to drive for thirteen years now, has originated in our automobile, listening to his never ending driving instructions. Just when I think I have mastered the patience test though, I find myself coming unglued again and yelling hysterically for him to shut up. Even saying the words "shut up" instead of "be quiet" will get his attention, but unfortunately I have spoken more graphically over the years, as I literally force myself not to do him or myself bodily harm. It's that bad.

There's a Bible verse that says, "God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able." This definitely has had fulfillment for me with the news that I qualify for this new service for Dean. God knows how much I can handle.

Now, I just pray this new chore provider can handle Dean. All I know already is that they aren't paying her enough.

Getting Turned Around

I'm hoping to share my thoughts and insights with others with this blog. It's a new avenue for me to accomplish this. But I'm hoping others will benefit from my "Teresa Talk" as much as I have benefited from others' blogs.

 First I must confess that autumn is my least favorite season, maybe because it speaks so much about the coming winter. Don't get me wrong, I don't mind winter too much, except that it makes the roads and sidewalks slippery.

Did anyone ever hear about my adventure going to a women's church  meeting one night and my car which I was driving did a complete cookie/circle on the corner of S. 48th and O St.?!!! I mean I was suddenly facing the oncoming traffic and had that weird feeling when you realize that you are faced totally opposite the world around you. Fortunately, I was driving slow enough that it all happened like in slow-motion, so my passenger and I suffered nothing but our hearts in our throats for a few seconds. I do credit her for being brave enough to ride with me after that though. As a matter of fact, the memory has been a source of amusement for us both.

Thinking back on it, I'm thankful that the Lord turns us around totally when we need it. We'd all better get used to going opposite those around us if we want to follow that radical, rebel, rabble-rouser of a guy called Jesus! He'll turn your world around too!!!