Don't Wait

When I took Dean to the dentist the other day, I just had to ask the receptionist how much teeth cleaning and an exam would cost. I've been having mouth and jaw pain myself now for months and been worrying about whether it might be a dental problem, the start of gum disease or something.

At first I thought the pain might be teeth grinding or jaw clenching--a response to stress. Especially since it seems to come and go. I even changed from a full facial mask at night back to my nasal one for my bi-pap. But even that didn't help for long. Just trying to find my own solution. Something that won't cost me much, since my insurance doesn't cover dental, and only partial medical.

Well, the dental exam she finally gave me just revealed that I do have a lot of plaque, but only one small cavity to fill. Not bad for not seeing a dentist for seven years, I thought! She thought getting my teeth cleaned would relieve my facial pain, so I'll get them cleaned and the cavity filled this coming week. I have my doubts that it will solve anything, but will see. Thinking now it might be a sinus problem. There is a tenderness higher up on my cheeks now when it does hurt.

What does all this have to do with caregiving for Dean? Nothing, really. Except it does reveal my tendency to work things out on my own. To shy away from things that cost something (understandable though, when finances are so tight--not uncommon for caregivers, by the way).

But all this is informing my faith life as well. I need to turn things over to the professionals more. And my professional Spiritual Advisor would be God. Counting the cost has to go too. Sin, no matter how painful or intermittent it may be, has to be resolved. Jesus already paid the price. Life is too short to be figuring things out on my own.

Gnashing of Teeth

 My experience has brought a whole new meaning to the verse that says in the end times there shall be "weeping and gnashing of teeth." Matthew 24:51

Insomnia and teeth grinding...who would connect the two with stress. But I can't ignore them any longer. How do you avoid stress when it is under your nose 24 hours a day? Obviously the only thing I can change is my response to it.

But how does one change such an unconscious response as teeth grinding. Especially when it's happening during sleep. Maybe it's a good thing I'm having insomnia, or my mouth would be hurting even more often than it does!

The reason I think these symptoms are stress related is because they are so sporadic. I can go for a few days and not have my mouth hurt at all; then I have several days when I find myself slathering ora-gel and holding hot washcloths to my face all day for relief. I can also sleep almost nine hours one night and the next night only be able to squeeze out three or four.

There doesn't seem to be a pattern with these symptoms. Maybe because as much as I try to schedule and keep to a tight program around here, it just seems impossible to create a pattern for what goes on in my busy caregiving life. That in itself can be stressful.

Plus my to-do lists seem to have a life of their own. The responsibilities and cares of life just keep pouring in. For instance, about a week ago my microwave quit working. Can't blame the thing, it was probably over two decades old anyway. The light and alarm had stopped working a few years back. It was so old it didn't even have a turntable, but at least it heated up our food.

That wouldn't be such a tragedy to most folks. But most folks don't have a family member who forgets to turn the stove off 75% of the time. Having a microwave is the only way I feel comfortable leaving him by himself, so he doesn't have to use a stove.

After looking into many options, I just decided to wait until our social security checks came in and then buy the cheapest one I could find. In the meantime, my daughter and son-in-law brought one over from a neighbor of theirs, and it didn't cost us a thing!

Countless times, God has provided for us that way. It reminded me that trust in God is my greatest tool in fighting off stress. Only when I turn my burdens over to Him can I have peaceful, non-grinding sleep. He has everything under control.
 

the "new" microwave--compliments of God

Don't Make Me Change

Dean went to the dentist this week to be fitted for a partial, in lieu of getting a couple of teeth on the bottom extracted here soon. I've forewarned them that he most likely wouldn't wear the partial, but since it's required by our insurance that he have it, we'll give it a try.

While we're at it, they're going to take a look at his upper teeth (the kind in a jar) and make sure they would fit with them, in the wild chance that he would actually begin to wear them again too. Fortunately, I have found both his partials here at home (he's been through two now) and will now take them in for a fitting.

The reason I am skeptical about his wearing anything artificial is the track record he's had with that over the last few years since his brain injury. First it was hearing aids. Got him the best, professionally fine-tuned device we could get to make up for some of the hearing he lost after the tractor accident. But he barely wore them one day, before retiring them to a box on his dresser. It's probably there still under the mountains of other items he has planted there.

Then there has been leg braces to help with his drop foot. The first two, I'll admit were very cumbersome and he absolutely refused to wear them. We got lucky with the last one though. It's streamlined enough that he hasn't minded it too much. Only wears it when he has to though.

I've come to the conclusion that it's change that Dean is so resistant to. His adjustment abilities are quite minimal. We did have one victory on this front yesterday though. He went to a barber shop and got rid of a bunch of head hair. Only wish he'd consented to having some facial hair removed too. But maybe someday I'll see that.

I hope I'm open to change when it comes to spiritual matters. It's vitally important to be open to new spiritual truth, while at the same time, resistant to false teachings. I just pray I will know the difference.