It's been awhile since I posted on this blog for caregivers. I've made a grand start a couple of times, but just never could grab onto the right train of thought. I guess my thoughts had actually all left their stations and were going in all directions and it was hard to track a traveler down for his particular destination.
But now that I've lost my voice with a cold virus and life is moving at a slower pace, I have an urge to get some of my thoughts out to somebody. They may not be worth anything, but they will serve to relieve my guilt of silence.
First of all, I thought the world would end if I became sick with a cold again, and certainly it would be in God's interest to keep me healthy and strong. This was my prayer at least as one after another of my loved ones got sick. It's true that it's been hard to find substitute babysitters for my granddaughters, and Dean has had to do more for himself since I got sick. But hey, life moves on. With or without my services.
I was a bit upset with God, but only for a few seconds. I had prayed for a miracle to happen and for me not to succumb to the pestilence that surrounded me, but it was not to be. Instead God has performed another kind of miracle though in helping me survive this new onslaught of sickness.
God knows what He's doing. I am content to be His instrument, as long as He gives me breath. Even if that breath is aided by a nebulizer, a bi-pap machine and oxygen concentrator every night. So there, cold virus, do your stuff.
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